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Superstition.
There!
What?
Over
there!
What is
it?
There
was a squirrel!
Oh.
It ran
up the tree, really fast.
So?
Faster
than I'd ever seen.
And?
That's
a sign!
What?
A sign.
Excuse
me?
Right
this morning I prayed that needed to know, really needed to know that
when my grandmother died, she'd go to heaven. And now there's
this squirrel shooting up the tree. I've always been sure as hell
she'd go to heaven, but it's better to have proof, you know.
It was
a squirrel.
It was
a sign.
In the
form of a squirrel.
Yes.
Superstition.
What an odd topic. For one might well ask: What is superstition?
Superstitions, in our everyday understanding of the word, are old wives tales and certain arbitrary rules, like: If you walk under a ladder, it causes bad luck. Superstition, in short, is the belief that there exists a causal relationship between (a) and (b) where there is none, often leading to the conclusion that (a) leads to (b) and (not a) leads to (not b).
Obviously, there is no connection between an everyday event and the concept of ‘bad luck'. But let us give it the benefit of the doubt and see whether this rule might not have somehow resulted from experience: 1. I once walked under a ladder. 2. There was a man with a bucket on top. 3. I walked out on the other side with bucket on head. 4. I then had a shit day and my head hurt. 5. Therefore, walking under ladders causes bad luck. The real explanation, unfortunately, is a little further from reality and has its roots in - you guessed it - religion. More specific, in Christianity. For ladder, wall and floor form a triangle, which in turn represents the Holy Trinity, which in turn is severed by your stupid self walking right through it. Therefore, you must be in bond with the devil. Logical, isn't it?
Another example: If I rub my right thigh, all the money in my bank account will double. If I rub the left one, it will halve. Sounds great, all I need is an unwashed right thigh and I'll be rich in no time. There is no logical connection between my thighs and the bank's computer system keeping track of the money in my account. But I believe there is. Therefore, I'd better refrain from rubbing my left thigh, which, incidentally, has the beneficial side-effect of making masturbation a lot more difficult, thus saving me from burning in hell eternally. Because rubbing your downstairs parts will after your death result in burning in a place that so far still has to be located on the map (so at least it's not Croydon, thank God). But I am digressing. I'll keep it short now:
I have absolutely no evidence but a firm belief that not coming to With Rhyme Or Reason will not only cause you bad luck, it will also lead to an abominable sex life, skin rashes in unspeakable areas and a heart-broken, clingy succubus that refuses to let go after you've woken up. There you go.
So get your unsophisticated, you know... butt over to die bühne on 17. April by 8.15 p.m. the latest and listen to the wise words of our totally un-superstitious authors so that you might learn from them.
Oh, and lest I forget: Strictly no WHISTLING, it's a fucking theatre, alright?
With Rhyme Or Reason - Superstition
17. April 2008, 20:15
Admission: 1 Euro
